is your anarchic wit trying to destroy this panel show?

[hardparade]

So this is kind of out of the blue, which in a way shouldn't be that surprising when you look at my past few entries. I've just been having sort of a British comedy fest, and then this post kind of...happened. It's sort of a primer, except that it assumes you already know who Russell Brand and Simon Amstell are. But apart from that, it's very thorough?

The thing is, sometimes I think that Simon Amstell is my favourite person. And against my better judgement I still have a special place in my heart for Russell Brand, despite all his wrongdoings. And the two of them are good friends and you know that I will ship people based on less than that, so...



Russell was on Never Mind The Buzzcocks back in 2008, and the episode was delayed for like, years, because of the scandal he and Jonathan Ross were involved in, but the BBC did eventually allow it to be broadcast. You can download it here. There actually weren't many moments between Simon and Russell, but there was an amusing bit where Simon brought out Russell's autobiography and lamented the fact that he wasn't mentioned in Russell's list of comedians he liked. And also this:

Simon: Russell?
Russell: Yes, dear?
Simon: Is your anarchic wit trying to destroy this panel show?
Russell: No! I'm definitely part of it and I want it to succeed!
Simon: 'Cause this is all I've got, this show, okay?
Russell: You're brilliant.
Simon: Thanks.

RUSSELL CALLS HIM 'DEAR' A LOT. ALSO 'DARLING'. I mean, Russell probably does that to everyone, and there is something about Simon Amstell that makes you want to give him petnames, but still. So cute. He also calls him 'Si' occasionally. ♥


I actually just took this cap because Russell looked pretty.


And here is Simon gazing at him.

Simon has also appeared in Russell's projects. His first appearance on Russell's radio show was on the 20th September 2008, and you can download it here. But because I'm me, I've obviously put together a bunch of the best/slashiest quotes from it. (Sometimes I think I should get a job where I have to transcribe things. I honestly enjoy it. I'm not sure what's wrong with me.)

Russell: Sat down next to me, looking baffled and bemused, is perhaps the hottest, sexiest broadcaster in the United Kingdom: Simon Amstell.
Simon: Gosh.
Russell: That's your introduction, Simon.
Simon: Hello.

Russell: I think [Dita Von Teese] is promoting a kind of a bra, so like it might be enthusiasm about this kind of bra that she's promoting.
Simon: What kind of bra?
Russell: It's a kind of a bra where the boobs are pushed right up all nice. (Simon cracks up) Is there any better bra? If you're gonna have a bra, get one what pushes the boobs up all nice. I really like you, you're such a funny young man. I've known him such a long while, you were about sixteen or something, weren't you, when I met you? You looked it.

I think part of what I love about their dynamic is that Simon is so—not innocent, but quite guarded, and I mean anyone would seem that way compared to Russell Brand, but like...Simon especially? And he doesn't talk about his sexuality much because he doesn't want to be defined by it, and Russell is SO defined by his sexuality. And also Russell is so in love with himself, and Simon sort of hates himself. They're such opposites, so it's fascinating to me that they're friends.

Russell: (after a song) 'I Love You', The Doors. That's how I start every conversation anyway. I'm here, on my Russell Brand radio show, with Simon Amstell, very kindly guest-hosting with me.
Simon: 'I Love You', The Doors.
Russell: 'I Love You', The Doors, too, Simon Amstell. I am very fond of you, Simon, you know that. Simon and I are doing this—
Simon: I'm fond of you, let me just say this.
Russell: Mm-hm?
Simon: I'm fond of you.
Russell: Yeah, I know, 'cause you do send me texts, 'let's not just be doing media things, let's keep a friendship, a genuine friendship that exists outside of media!'
Simon: No, because—well, it would be nice to talk to you when it wasn't being broadcast, once.

Honestly, I'm not sure I've ever heard Simon be so nice to anyone, which is quite weird when you think about it. But the two of them are so open about liking each other and being Actual Friends, and it's so cute.

Simon: I was very touched—you know I did that charity gig for you, that you didn't ask me to do but I turned up anyway because I had nothing else going on in my life?
Russell: Yeah. I just put out that you were doing it, just started advertising without asking you, yeah, Focus 12, yeah, that.
Simon: And then as a thank you, you sent me a lovely teapot.
Russell: Did you like it?
Simon: I did, and then I realised, you had not chosen this teapot.
Russell: I actually did! I went to Fortnum & Masons with Tom, my PA (Simon cracks up) and chose that teapot. I think it was my idea, even.
Simon: (skeptical) Was it?
Russell: Might've been.
Simon: 'Cause I felt like, hang on a minute, this isn't—this is the PA. And the only time I've met this PA is when I've been drinking tea, and he's thought that's what I do in my life.
Russell: (putting on a voice) Simon Amstell, eh? He strikes me as a tea-drinking kind of guy! Oh, am I not allowed to mention that? Hey, don't pigeonhole me as a tea-drinker! (Simon sighs) I like a whole host of beverages from around the world! Sometimes I have hot chocolate! You don't drink booze though, do you, Simon? Even though you haven't had the common courtesy to develop a real glamorous drug problem like some of us.
Simon: (laughs) No, but your PA did call me from LA to invite me to an AA meeting with you. Thinking I was another Simon, I guess.
Russell: Yeah, there's another Simon—
Simon: Well, let's not name him.
Russell: Who will remain anonymous. He could be anyone called Simon, really.
Simon: But it was nice just to hear from someone. I was like, oh, well I could get on a plane and come, but I...I'm not an alcoholic.

Lol, the bit where Russell starts making fun of the tea-drinking is because throughout basically the entire show, he keeps referencing the fact that Simon is gay, and Simon has to keep calling him out on his mild homophobia. I just—there's something about that, the way Russell always fixates on Simon's sexuality, you can totally imagine him grilling Simon for totally inappropriate details about his sex life. He just WOULD. Also, how cute is it that he got Simon a teapot (or that he got his PA to get Simon a teapot)? And that Simon was so disappointed to realise it might not have been a personal gift?

Russell: Simon?
Simon: Yes?
Russell: You all right, darling? You look—you're doing that little face you do, sometimes, when you're about to judge me. Got a little judgement you wanna do? (Simon sighs) Go on, judge me. Judge me!
Simon: I think you're lovely. What a lovely guy.
Russell: Thank you very much for your positivity.
Simon: And you know, well done! Well done!
Russell: What's that, getting off drugs?
Simon: Look at this, Radio 2!
Russell: It's good, innit? It's going really well. Here we are—do you remember when we first met, we were just in a shambling East End warehouse, modeling dodgy clothes?—actually, they were quite good clothes, by junkies, I recall.
Simon: Yeah, yeah.
Russell: And now, here we are, in a different room.
Simon: A different room!
Russell: This one's got a carpet, so that's nice, isn't it?

This is another thing—Simon would TOTALLY constantly judge Russell's entire lifestyle, so often that Russell can sense when he's about to do it. Just for context: this comes just after Russell telling a story about being in hospital back when he was on heroin, and being disappointed that none of the nurses wanked him off. Alsooo, I am intrigued by that story of how they first met. Modeling?! And especially if Simon was still a teenager when they met, because Russell's five years older than him, and I get the impression they've known each other for ages but haven't actually been close for that long. Idk, idk, I want to know more.

Simon: So I'm at your flat, the other evening, and I thought, ah, it's nice, I'll go and see Russell—
Russell: Yeah?
Simon: (sighs) A woman peels out of the bedroom and I've got to make polite conversation with her while you go and talk to David Baddiel on the phone for half an hour. What happened to our dinner?
Russell: I did give you a dinner.
Simon: Oh, yeah, sort of got some cardboard boxes, you slapped some organic vegetarian food on a plate—
Russell: Delicious!
Simon: And then you want me to clear it away!
Russell: You didn't contribute! You just sat there!
Simon: I was a guest!
Russell: But I think—hold on, mate, I know you well enough for you to do a bit of tidying up if you come round for dinner, and to oblige you to talk to a woman that you now know as well as I do. (Simon cracks up) Having spoken to her for half an hour, which is actually more than I've ever done. Was she nice? What sort of a person—
Simon: She was really nice!
Russell: Was she, honestly?
Simon: You should sleep with her.
Russell: (laughs) I took care of that.

BEST. STORY. EVER. Seriously though, that whole scene, it sounds like it was just lifted from a fic. And I wonder why Simon was so bothered, because I would assume he's experienced that (or something similar) many times before, being friends with Russell. And it's just so ridiculously easy to imagine, and the way they bicker is such a thing—it comes across weirdly domestic. There's another whole bit—I've forgotten which episode it's in, now—where Simon is washing some grapes and Russell finds it hilarious how pernickety he is, and then they bicker a bit about the fact that Simon accidentally dropped some grapes on the floor, and the whole thing is just so cute it hurts.

Russell: Ta-ra, love, see you later! There she goes, Dita Von Teese!
Simon: Oh, my god.
Russell: Go on, what's your problem Amstell?
Simon: Oh my god.
Russell: I see you started playing with the microphone. I thought, oh look at him, he's sulking, I should involve him, he's done me a massive favour coming on the show, but then I thought hold on, I'm actually gonna get to go out with Dita Von Teese. Simon Amstell and I, we've got a bit of history, enough in the bank, I can probably leave him there for about ten minutes to incubate.

This was after a long phone call with Dita Von Teese in which Russell basically pressured her to have sex with him, and Simon was SO ASHAMED on Russell's behalf. I love the idea of him going all quiet and sulking while Russell is chatting someone up, though.

There's also this video of their highlights from the show, and omg, it is the cutest thing ever. I love that Russell is such a ridiculously tactile person and so he just slings his arm round Simon's shoulder because that's really not a big deal to him, and Simon is so obviously uncomfortable with unexpected physical contact. But they're so touchy-feely throughout this!






I do enjoy that Jonathan Ross enters with "I hear you two were in a hot tub the other night." And that by this point, Simon is full-on clinging to Russell's chest. What.

Simon returned to the show about a month later, on the 25th October, and you can download that episode here. Again, choice quotes!

Russell: Look at my hips move!
Simon: His hips are moving.
Russell: My hips are moving, in a way that would make sex enjoyable if you were near enough to me.

Russell: You, Simon, you're pursuing a slightly different lifestyle as a result of my friendship, is that not fair to say?
Simon: You've suggested to me that I should have a bit more fun, and I am trying my best.
Russell: Well, you were doing well, I thought! After we picked up that lad, and I'm sorry to use this literal language, on Hampstead Heath.
Simon: I don't know what to say.
Russell: It was in the daytime, we weren't cottaging—
Simon: I don't know what you're talking about.
Russell: Simon and I, we went for a stroll—
Simon: We didn't go for a stroll, we've never been for a stroll, I've never strolled. I never stroll, I walk or I run, I don't stroll.
Russell: Meandered? Sauntered? I mean, there was no pace about it.
Simon: Nothing has ever happened.
Russell: Don't talk about that?
Simon: Don't talk about me and my...life.
Russell: Your Mum already knows.
Simon: My Mum doesn't know anything, I'm a recluse, I stay in and I watch This Morning.
Russell: When you're not hosting pop quizzes, or turning up on your chum's radio show, or trawling the Heath for talent—it's Simon Amstell, the lovable recluse! All right, you didn't do that.
Simon: Nothing happened.
Russell: Nothing happened, fair enough.
Simon: There was no, er—nothing.
Russell: Okay. Certainly no sexual activity to be condemned for.
Simon: Oh, my god.

That last bit—Simon actually talks about this occurence in his stand-up, Do Nothing. I saw it live, and he just talked about being with a friend who managed to hook him up with this stranger and was giving him all these one-night-stand tips. He never mentioned Russell by name. And then a few weeks later I listened to this, and was like OH MY GOD IT WAS RUSSELL BRAND, THAT MAKES SO MUCH SENSE. Anyway, this is also the best story ever, because of the IDEA of Russell Brand picking up men for Simon to have sex with, and the way Simon is so adorably bashful about the whole thing. And again, I bet Russell grilled him for all the details the morning after.

Russell: Hold on, can't you just let them punch themselves out, on the cat? Right, you know, sort of like—not literally like punch the cat, I just mean they spend all their affection on the cat, they get comfortable stroking the cat, being with the cat, and that's when you sidle—and I use that word deliberately—sidle up to them, just place your clammy little palm on their shoulder—
Simon: Not clammy. Not clammy!
Russell: Clammy disgusting hand—
Simon: No, it's—it's clean.
Russell: And just nod towards your bedroom, your frankly underfurnished bedroom. Underfurnished. Only thing in there is a big poster of you. That's all there is in there.
Simon: That's in the spare bedroom, and it was sent to me by a promoter, and I don't know what to do with it.
Russell: And on it, it says 'tickets available.' Tragically.
Simon: Yeah, I know, that's a worry, isn't it? It doesn't say, like, 'now on sale,' but 'still,' it's like they weren't sold out.
Russell: Half-price tickets! Please!
Simon: Not half-price! They were restricted—
Russell: Two for the price of one!
Simon: Look, I've done very well! I'm a human!
Russell: You're doing fantastically well, you are the brilliant Simon Amstell, no one can argue with that.

Simon was talking about how he just got a cat (and Russell was like "You're spoiling that cat! You fuss over him too much!" which is adorable, and again, kind of domestic) and Russell was suggesting he lure people into bed by using the cat's cuteness, or something. And auugh, I just love it when they talk about going round to each other's houses, it's so weird and cute to imagine.

Russell: What've you got coming up? More Buzzcockery?
Simon: Nothing, nothing, just television. Television.
Russell: Well, d'you know what? There's people out there, they'd love to present Buzzcocks. D'you remember that, they could've chosen from any of—d'you remember, before you got it, loads of people had a go. You was the one they chose, weren't you pleased? Lauren Laverne had a go, who else had a go? All different ones, and they picked you! You should be happy!
Simon: (laughing) You sound like my Mum. Who is now the only person who texts me after each show, nobody—I don't even know if anyone watches it anymore.
Russell: People watch it! People like it! When you come on this radio show—look, there's this email here.
Simon: Go on.
Russell: "Ain't Simon Amstell nice? Thank god he's on the show with you! I'd give anything, literally anything, to—"
Simon: He's not even holding a piece of paper.
Russell: "—have a back-baby with him." A back-baby, people want with you! Isn't that lovely!

"YOU SOUND LIKE MY MUM." ♥ And aww, I really do love the way that Russell tries so hard to reassure Simon when he's being all insecure and self-deprecating. And he does it so casually, too—I'm sure it's the kind of thing that happens a lot. He obviously does tease him, but in general I think he's probably good for Simon's ego, he'd always be there to be like YOU'RE AMAZING whenever Simon is down on himself.

Russell: Ever since you've become promiscuous like what I am—
Simon: Not like what you are! Not to your scale, but just maybe once—once a fortnight.
Russell: Once a fortnight is too much for you, and for the poor sods out there that have to put up with your spindly ruts.
Simon: They like my cat!
Russell: 'Course they like the cat, it's a distraction from you! No, you're gorgeous.
Simon: (awkwardly) Thanks. Thanks.
Russell: I tell you what, if I wasn't so heterosexual—
Simon: Yeah. Yeah, god.
Russell: I'd be, oooh, all sorts of—
Simon: If I wasn't so picky!
Russell: (laughing) There he is, Simon Amstell, my actual friend, saying that to me and my feelings.

Omg, omg, BEST. And omg you have to actually listen to this bit, just to hear the way they say it all—Simon is SO AWKWARD and it's like the subtext is oh god Russell please shut up because he knows where Russell is going with this. I imagine Russell is one of those straight men who assumes that every gay guy fancies him, and so he believes that on some level Simon does actually want to sleep with him, and he probably tries to get Simon to admit this.

There are also pictures of them hanging out in their own time!


With Carl Barat, for some reason!


Again, Russell is all over Simon, which I feel links back to what I said before—I mean, Russell is naturally a flirty and touchy-feely person, but I think he probably gets more of a kick out of it with Simon because Simon isn't, and I think Russell just finds it weirdly exciting to flirt with a gay man. Like, maybe he feels it puts him in a position of power because he feels like he's teasing Simon and it's not actually going to come to anything, or maybe it's a latent homosexuality thing, because for such a heterosexual man, Russell can be REALLY gay.


Awwww.


There's also this, from the aforementioned Focus 12 gig, which INVOLVED NOEL FIELDING ALSO, and like—don't even get me started on that, because I ship Simon/Russell, Noel/Russell, AND Noel/Simon, and...you know me and threesomes. Oh god, it would be glorious. But yeah, I just love how extroverted and flamboyant they are and he's just kind of standing there awkwardly. There's a video up on Youtube from the gig, which is really hard to understand but apparently Russell says something about Simon's 'gay bottom' and Simon says "I feel like the most heterosexual person on the bill, to be honest."

The really tragic thing is that I don't believe there is any fic about these two out there. WHY, UNIVERSE? I want to write it, but writing Russell Brand intimidates me. I did do it once. And I would like to do it again, because there needs to be lots and lots of Simon/Russell (and Noel/Simon/Russell) in the world. It's weird that I'm getting so into this now, actually—I started shipping them back when I first listened to the radio shows a couple of years ago, and it all feels a bit out-of-date now, like who even knows if they're still friends? BUT YOU CAN SET FIC IN THE PAST. THAT'S A THING THAT CAN HAPPEN. You can also ignore Katy Perry. In fact, as a general rule, I'd say you should ignore Katy Perry. I'm just gonna go ahead and use my 'fuck you katy perry' tag for this, because I can.


This is one of those times where I spend a while compiling a post, only to realise there will be almost no interest at all. *sigh*

Comments

[justwolf.livejournal.com]

I've never really thought about Simon/Russell, although I pretty much ship Russell/the universe, so I guess in that sense I have, but they would be very cute together. I love how touchy-feely Russell is being, but I really love the one image where Simon is touching him back, because that never happens with Simon and it's very cute. Throwing Noel into the mix too? Wow. Although I feel like Simon might just be swamped with both of them around.

Simon: But it was nice just to hear from someone. I was like, oh, well I could get on a plane and come, but I...I'm not an alcoholic.
That? Is adorable. I love that. I'm interested in the way Simon always talks about himself like he doesn't really go out much or have many friends, and I wonder how true it is.

I really like reading the things you typed up. I'd never seen them before, and they were really cute to read. Thank you!

[likecharity.livejournal.com]

Lol, Russell/the universe is basically canon. XD It is lovely to see Simon touching him back, isn't it? I kind of didn't realise, until I was compiling this post, how rare it is for him to show affection towards people. And yeah, he would TOTALLY be swamped with both Noel and Russell - I imagine it very much like the last picture/video. XD But it would be so amazing, at the same time! I really want to write it but it's overwhelming somehow to think about.

I think it's pretty true. In the radio things, he talks a lot about being a ~recluse~, and Russell makes fun of him for it, but I imagine Simon probably started going out more because of Russell's influence. In general I think he's just pretty socially awkward, so I wouldn't be surprised if he didn't go out much.

♥ You're welcome! I'm glad you enjoyed it.

[calistomyth.livejournal.com]

Mmmmm you've reminded me why I love these guys so much! Thank you :)
"Simon: 'I Love You', The Doors.
Russell: 'I Love You', The Doors, too, Simon Amstell. "

*giggles* oh how I miss NMTB :(

[likecharity.livejournal.com]

:D My pleasure!! They're so cute.

[likecharity.livejournal.com]

Oh, that's so awesome!! That was cool of you not to make a big deal of it at the time, as well - I imagine that's the kind of thing that would make him a bit nervous.

[prunesquallormd.livejournal.com]

Oh my god, huge post is huge!

I'm going to have to come back to it when I'm not really needing to get an early night, so this is just me saying I'm definitely interested! I love Simon Amstell, and Noel Fielding too, and I think I could be persuaded on Russell Brand. Well, maybe :)

[hypertwink.livejournal.com]

After reading this, I read up on Simon. There's a little bit of hate towards him regarding Darren Hayes. Do you know what the hell did he do to that guy years ago when he was closeted?

Anyway, I've only watched a handful of Buzzcocks but I've enjoyed most of them. The one that truly sticks in my mind was the episode where Josh Groban was so surprisingly hilarious.

[likecharity.livejournal.com]

Oh, I'd forgotten about that - I only have a vague memory, but I think he just made some comments in a (possibly televised?) interview about Darren's sexuality and he took it really badly? Simon is also known for having made Britney Spears cry in an interview, so, it's not terribly surprising. :/

Some of them are really great! The first couple of seasons that Simon hosted were hilarious.

[blackwayfarers.livejournal.com]

I mean, it was kind of staring me in the face but



holy shit




Simon Amstell is the British Jesse Eisenberg. The way he talks is identical it's ridiculous. TOO MANY CURLY JEWS I WANT TO MARRY.

[likecharity.livejournal.com]

I KNOW RIGHT

I had this revelation the other day and then felt kind of stupid because it seemed SO OBVIOUS.

And then I stumbled across the information that Simon is friends with Andrew Garfield, and there was apparently a rumour that they dated, and my brain promptly imploded.

[blackwayfarers.livejournal.com]

I WANT TO BELIEVE THEY DATED I DO but I'm like 99% sure Andrew is totally straight (you know, just down with the gays. His first theatre role was in the play version of Beautiful Thing baw) THAT BEING SAID: HAVE YOU SEEN this?

It's legit, a charity for Andrew's brother's wedding, posted during the filming of TSN (before the fandom would had been insane and made something like this) and has donations from: Simon, Jesse (please note: Jesse donated the same day that Andrew did ;___; and left a hilarious Jesse comment I'M GONNA DIE), Spike Jonze. IT'S THE BEST THING IN THE WORLD.

[likecharity.livejournal.com]

THAT'S SO INTERESTING because I could easily see Andrew as bisexual. But honestly I am just thrilled enough believing that they are friends, OMG HE DONATED SOMETHING FOR ANDREW'S BROTHER, THAT IS THE CUTEST. ♥

[crowie.livejournal.com]

Really enjoyed the post and transcriptions and summaries and much awesomeness.

Laughed out loud at the: "I imagine Russell is one of those straight men who assumes that every gay guy fancies him" bit. So true. Although to be fair I think Russel Brand thinks that every single person on this planet fancies him (apart from his mum probably).

As a tangent I loved the bit in his autobiography where he was talking about where he picked up some of his more camp mannerisms. He kept being mistaken for a girl so as a self defense thing to at least be taken for the right gender he'd start being super camp. There's something about that relating to gender performance and sexuality that I find really interesting.

..also hi! I've been lurking your journal on and off for a bit, found it first through your very excellent Skins fic :)

[likecharity.livejournal.com]

:D Yay, I'm glad!

LOL, so true.

Ooh, I don't remember that. I've been meaning to reread his autobiography. That is interesting.

Aww, hi! :)

[moderntrickster.livejournal.com]

I'm so ridiculously in love with the idea of Noel/Simon that I've completely neglected the thought of Russel/Simon, but yeah. I really love it and everything you said here is just right! I really love reading your posts. Everything is so well thought-out and that's not something you see often.

[likecharity.livejournal.com]

Icon. ♥

I can totally understand being distracted by Noel/Simon on account of it BEING AMAZING, but yeah, there is so much Russell/Simon potential as well. I'm glad you liked the post!

[sofiawonderland.livejournal.com]

NOEL/SIMON/RUSSELL, NOEL/SIMON/RUSSELL, YES. I'm sorry, I just get very excited over imaginary threesomes involving adorable and flirty and hilarious British men.

Aren't they lovely? I have this thing with Russell Brand which is that I think he's absolutely adorable even if, by definition, I feel like he would not be my cup of tea at all. But for some reason I go "awwww" every time I see him and it's a whole mix of wanting to hug him and jump his bones. It's hard to explain.

(Also: Hello, I'm a lurker, but this post got me really excited and commenting felt very much needed)

[likecharity.livejournal.com]

WOULDN'T IT JUST BE LIKE, AN EXPLOSION OF AWESOMENESS? Oh my god. I wish it existed already because the idea of writing it kind of terrifies me. BUT I WANT IT SO BAD.

Lol, that is basically how I feel about him too. He's just one of those people that I can't hate, or even really be irritated by. I used to dislike him until I actually properly watched him on something, and then he just charmed me somehow. WITCHCRAFT.

(Yay for de-lurking! Hi!!)

[sofiawonderland.livejournal.com]

I do not trust myself to write any of them, so I definitely won't be writing it. Still, I hope someone *wink wink nudge nudge* writes it because OMG HOW I WANT IT. If you ever feel like writing it and want encouragement, I'm willing to strike a deal. Say, I'll give you my first born or maybe some pieces of cake or your reward of choice. I just really need this in my life. Hahahaha.

And yes, the SORCERY OF RUSSELL BRAND. I do not understand how it works, but there's something about it that just makes me love him no matter what. It's a problem, let me tell you.

(De-lurking means I'll probably be commenting like crazy and talking a lot. Be warned.)

[likecharity.livejournal.com]

I've written each of them separately, but the idea of writing all three at once is seriously overwhelming. I don't know WHY, they all just have really specific personalities or something. LET'S SEE WHAT HAPPENS THOUGH.

COMMENTING LIKE CRAZY AND TALKING A LOT IS DEFINITELY A GOOD THING. I LOOK FORWARD TO IT. ♥

[prunesquallormd.livejournal.com]

I.. I'm still not sure what to think of Russell Brand.
I just can't figure out how much of his persona is a front, and how much of it is actually him. Simon Amstell, on the other hand, I absolutely love. He's so cute, and he's especially sweet here because he seems so shy and bashful.
I guess, being very much the introvert myself, I find introverts a lot easier to like and sympathise with? I don't know.

That being said, though, Simon and Russell are totally adorable together, and totally fic-worthy. It would be a huge shame if they're not friends any more (and grrr Katy Perry. Don't talk to me about Katy Perry! I very much approve of your tag :P).
If you were inclined to write a ridiculous Noel Fielding/Simon Amstell/Russell Brand threesome, I suspect I might be tempted to read it XD

♥

[likecharity.livejournal.com]

I think it's actually just HIM, though I understand feeling wary of that. I like him and Simon in totally different ways - I basically adore Simon's entire existence and kind of want to be his boyfriend, but I would NOT want to go anywhere near Russell Brand and am much happier to be entertained by him from a distance. XD He's really a very interesting man, though.

I didn't really think about the idea that they might no longer be friends until I got to the end of the post and realised that all of this info was from 2008. I know Simon's spoken out about Katy Perry's homophobia and stuff and I can't imagine him approving of Russell being with her, but I'm also not sure that he'd end their friendship over it.

Anyway, thanks for reading this and giving it some thought! ♥

[readitlikeanegg.livejournal.com]

Hi! I know you don't know me, but I came across this while doing a twitter search for Simon Amstell, and it led me here. Aw, and this is just the most adorable entry ever - I totally ship Simon/Russell, and Simon/Noel, and basically Simon/everyone. There definitely should be more fic written about him. I love the radio podcasts, and I haven't heard them for a while now, so it was lovely to read your transcripts and sort of hear them in my head. Too cute. ♥

[likecharity.livejournal.com]

Aww, awesome! I'm glad you enjoyed the post. Simon/everyone is definitely a ship that should be shipped. THERE SHOULD BE ALL THE FIC EVER.

[chimneypot.livejournal.com]

AUGH, ok, i'm the person who wrote the brief nathan/reid fic, and this is incredible, because i just finished watching grandma's house again last night and was thinking, gosh, why don't more people write amstell fic? and then i trawled and ended up here. the moar you lurk!

i am so going to write russell brand/simon amstell. even though i, like, can't bear russell brand. this needs to be done. I WILL WRITE IT THIS WEEKEND. if i can fit it in, because i'm going to see dylan moran and i may need some recovery time after.

(also, an aside that's probably not all that interesting to anyone but me: my best friend is basically simon amstell - thin, curly-haired, self-deprecating, barbed wit, mean to everyone/socially insecure, indienerd-thing going on, terrible with men, gay but pointedly doesn't bring it up etc etc, and also weirdly called simon too - and he LOVES russell brand. LOVES HIM. maybe it really is a simon thing.)

[likecharity.livejournal.com]

OMG HI YOU! What a coincidence, that's awesome. (Seriously thought, why DON'T more people write Amstell fic? THERE IS SO MUCH POTENTIAL AND IT WOULD BE SO GOOOOOOD, AUGH.)

If you wrote Russell/Simon, I would basically explode with joy. I DON'T EVEN CARE THAT YOU DON'T LIKE RUSSELL. IT WILL BE AWESOME. Also YAY DYLAN MORAN, you clearly have good taste in comedy. :D

(Thaaat is pretty cool. Yep, Russell clearly just has some kind of effect on skinny, curly-haired, awkward witty gay men called Simon.)

[(Anonymous)]

COOEE. i really don't understand why more people don't write it, i mean, there's loads of british-comedian fic about people i'd assume would be far more obscure, like charlie brooker or victoria coren or dara o' briain (WHO ISN'T EVEN BRITISH BUT WHATEVER). also there is no dylan moran fic, which like what srsly because i adore him. SO I SHALL REMEDY THIS. i mean, i have a raging hangover right now and can't really think coherently, as going to see dm last night clearly required a lot of wine. BUT FIC WILL BE WRITTEN.

i can't bear russell brand, but i find him interesting, if that makes sense? like, i enjoy reading about his life & i've read parts of his autobio because of my personal simon, but i just don't want to actually watch/listen to him. but i like the idea of there being a weird power dynamic in the relationship of camp-yet-straight, sex-obsessed hedonist with high self esteem & a shy, awkward & kind of self-loathing nerd! i am all about the weird power dynamics. i really do think it's interesting that rb continually talks himself up while nearly all of grandma's house, & sa's standup, is all about what a nerd he is.

also, i want to set it in paris. i think i will set it in paris. SELF INDULGENCEEEEE

[chimneypot.livejournal.com]

FFS THAT ANONYCOMMENT WAS ME.

[likecharity.livejournal.com]

THERE SHOULD TOTALLY BE DYLAN MORAN FIC. And yeah, the British comedian fic seems to be so random. You'd think there would be WAY more fic about Russell Brand than Charlie Brooker. (Although I am a bit of a fan of Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell so that's not really something I'm complaining about.) In any case: MORE FIC ABOUT COMEDIANS, IT IS NECESSARY.

That totally makes sense. I found his autobiography fascinating and the one time I did write fic about him, it sort of delved into issues with his sexuality because I couldn't help it. I think I find him more interesting than funny, actually. And that's the thing, he is actually such an interesting person to write about ANYWAY, and then you combine that with the weird dynamic of him and Simon and it's like - HOW IS THERE NOT FIC EVERYWHERE? I guess maybe it's a bit intimidating. It is to me, anyway.

I APPROVE OF IT BEING SET IN PARIS, ALSO.

[chimneypot.livejournal.com]

hahahaha oh god i think i wrote like dylan moran/russell brand about a year ago when i had nothing to do with myself and never put it up because i never finished it and it was dreadful and i kept thinking that the only thing they had in common was drinking a lot hahaha i completely forgot that. also yeah i have kind of a thing for charlie brooker even though he looks like a frog. i dunno, i think grizzled and pissed off is kind of my thing. dylan moran is going grey and got a proper haircut and it is actually quite attractive, even if it's weird seeing him without the bernard black mop! I CAN'T BELIEVE THERE ISN'T EVEN BLACK BOOKS RPF, I MEAN, I HAVE NO INTEREST IN READING SLASH BUT BILL BAILEY WROTE AN ARTICLE ABOUT HOW DEBONAIR AND ERUDITE AND CULTURED DYLAN MORAN IS AND DM WROTE ABOUT HOW FUNNY AND NICE AND WARM AND FRIENDLY HE IS AND HOW HAS NO ONE PICKED UP ON THIS.

i think it's weird that there's so little fic of simon amstell when he's actually gay & flirts with the men on occasion, in a sort of nerdy way... but i have actually started writing! this fic! and i have no idea why because i should be writing an essay about thomas pynchon! but this is more fun!

GRATUITOUS PARIS. because i have only been to london once and very briefly, and there is no reason for them to be in ireland, which is the only other setting option, so - paris it is!

[treacle-tartlet.livejournal.com]

Hi there, hi. Um. So, a friend of a friend gave me a link to your Jedward/Noel things, and I have been flailing for ages about the dire need for there to be slash based on that episode AND THERE IT IS, ALL PORNY AND PERFECT AND THERE'S A SEQUEL AND EVERYTHING. And as a result of all this I may or may not have been rewatching NMTB and the Boosh and Big Fat Quiz of the Year and ignoring most of my fannish duties for the last few weeks. Everything that I've read in your journal sort of makes me wave my hands about and make gleeful squeeing sounds because yes, Russell/Simon & Russell/Noel & Russell/Noel/Simon & Russell/Noel/Jedward YES TO ALL THE THINGS, OKAY?

Ahem. Okay, that was a bit embarassing. I am just full of FEELINGS about these men >_>

So, I'm going to friend you, because this obviously you write about things that are relevant to my interests. I hope that's okay?

[likecharity.livejournal.com]

Hahaha awesome! I LOVE that you wanted fic since seeing the episode, it makes me so happy when I unknowingly fulfil someone's wishes like that. XD And omg, I have been rewatching those things too!! Watching the Jedward episode reminded me of my love for Noel and then I just went off watching everything tangentially related. Incidentally, have you heard Simon's interview of Noel and Julian on XFM back in like 2006? It is SO SLASHY.

Anyway, so glad that other people are flailing about all the possibilities, and it is absolutely fine that you friended me, though I'm not sure how common posts like this one are going to be!

[snarkster-alien.livejournal.com]

Interest! So much interest here! Except it's so sad because I binge on Amstell, then have to leave so I can rewatch and feel all the feelings and deal with the lack of resolution again. Where is all the Amstell fic guys? Where?